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  • Writer's pictureJoe Griffiths-Barrasso

The Counselling Effect...

BACP (British Association for Counsellors and Psychotherapy), the ethical body that I am a full registered member of, released research (on World Mental Health Day) that revealed 92% of people who’ve had counselling or psychotherapy agree it’s a good idea to seek counselling or psychotherapy for a problem before it gets out of hand. This final piece of the statement is the critical part.

Its understandable, and perfectly normal from what I have experience to carry your problems around with you. Distractions help and play a small role, but the fact is problems, because you haven't healed them in a way that works to your own intuition and natural way of being, will stay wherever you go or whatever you do, just waiting for the opportunity to bring you down. If you get used to this too much you could identify with it, and believe its part of ho you are, and how you are, which of course is the cycle of doom (a term I coined when describing the unfulfilling patterns of self-rejection and mistrust).

The easy option is always the fastest, which is "crack on" with life and (or search) for ways to "cope" or, in a paradoxical view, by relying on a sentiment given to us by others who didn't grasp the finer details of healing/processing which is "Time heals all wounds" (ANON, 2020). Of course time also kills you.

To silence the inner critic is to completely fall in love with yourself. This is not the same as becoming a narcissist, quite different (Mayo Clinic (2022). To feel powerful and better than others is not the same a solving yourself because the value of love has nothing to do with power, looks, entitlement or any other characteristic identified by years of study as narcissism. To love yourself, means to love life, and all its gifts both seen and unseen and this includes others too. Its a truly beautiful place within yourself, that already exists within each and every human. The capacity to love is a given, but can you locate this within yourself? Or is it lost amongst the analogous weeds, and hard rock formed to protect you as you grew up and learned to love others as a trade off for love returned to you, but not to love yourself for who you are, and your self-worth that is your potential (your gift).

The survey of more than 5,000 UK adults, which was carried out with YouGov, also found that 82% of people who’ve had counselling or psychotherapy agree people might be happier if they talked to a counsellor or psychotherapist about their problems. This is a given. How honest are you really with your friends and family? Or indeed how often do you recognise your own voice? Or the voice in your head as serving you and not its irrational construct of danger, fear and abandonment (isolation) of self? It gets quite tricky to be the person you are when you begin to pull on the thread and unravel what lies beneath. This is the reason skilled counsellors exist, in particular those of the Person-Centred variety (please note other forms of counselling exist and can equally benefit clients, this is not about knocking other therapies, combined, they make a potent force for good).

77% of people who’ve had counselling or psychotherapy would be likely to recommend it to someone who had emotional difficulties or a mental health problem, the research also found. The vast majority agree its worth investing in yourself. for some its not the right counselling or the right counsellor for them. do they go on and keep trying? I cannot say, however the research does not tell us what the 23% felt about counselling, and perhaps its not important here. I do know that counselling can be less effective if the client is less honest and open in sessions, and that indeed the NHS service can feel brutal for some, and increased wait lists an pressure on the magnificent NHS service (and it really is magnificent in my view given what we expect from our country in todays societies and the distance travelled through our short history of modernism for the NHS to still exist is remarkable) puts pressure on the limited sessions a therapist has to work with clients. They are also fixated on the CBT approach, which does not fit all.

I offer a free consultation for 30 mins via phone after the completion of a short online form. The consultation takes us thorough your responses to the questions on the form, and to see if my type of counselling is right for you. I"d rather you get what your investment in self deserves, and not take your money for any other reason. I am of course 100% ethical, open and honest, and my only guarantee is that I bring all of me for the benefit if all of you in my sessions.

The form can be found here >>

I wish you well, wherever you are, and hope if you need some help with your problem issues, that you will at least give the free 30 minute consultation a try.


  1. Anon, (2020). Time heals all wounds. [online] Available at:

  2. Mayo Clinic (2022). Narcissistic personality disorder - Symptoms and causes. [online] Mayo Clinic. Available at:

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